Here’s How Many Divorcés Say They’ve Had Sex With Their Ex

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Old bedroom habits die hard: According to a new survey, quite a few divorcés continue to hit the sheets with their exes post-split. 

The poll– conducted by Research Now to mark the season premiere of Bravo’s “The Girlfriends’ Guide To Divorce” — surveyed 1,021 married and divorced people between the ages 18 and 49. Of the 715 divorced men and women polled, 27 percent admitted to sleeping with their exes after their divorce or separation. 

Sex with an ex may seem problematic – can you ever really move on from someone if you’re still getting it on? —  but it’s an easy trap to fall into, especially if you’ve been married for years, said sociologist and sexologist Pepper Schwartz.

“There is often one person in a divorce who wasn’t ready to let go and sex is a way of getting both comfort and sometimes, a way back in,” Schwartz, who’s unaffiliated with the poll, told The Huffington Post.

Another interesting hypothesis for why we hook up post-split? One last go-round with an ex may be a way of marking our territory, said Tammy Nelson, a sex and relationship therapist and author of The New Monogamy.

“Sleeping with an ex can also be what in the animal kingdom is called ‘mate guarding,’ a perfectly natural but sometimes totally unconscious way to leave a mark on an ex –sort of like peeing on their leg — to make sure that no one else sleeps with them or that they wont be interested in having sex with anyone else anytime soon,” Nelson, who is also unaffiliated with the poll, explained.

Or sometimes – in the immortal words of Drake — we just “hate sleeping alone.” 

“It could just be that the person is lonely,” said Schwartz. “Even if the couple doesn’t want to get back together, they reach out to each other for comfort or relief through sex. They often regret it — the old issues are still there — but they needed someone, even a someone they have had severe conflicts with or were disappointed in.” 

Still, not all divorcés are busy having sex with their ex.  According to the Bravo-commissioned survey, 40 percent of divorced respondents said the best part of being divorced was moving on to sex with new people.

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Faith Nouri is licensed to practice law in both the U.S. and Canadian Federal Courts. Ms. Nouri is an attorney at law in California, and a Barrister & Solicitor in British Columbia, Canada.